i was engaged in a lot of conversation this weekend. i was at my cousin's wedding. he married a beautiful girl. they seem to be swank hipsters. smart but blind. i don't give a shit. family love-ties erase the need for doubt-hate.
the chats were trite but refreshing. at times i was engrossed in the words i was saying or the words that the others were putting forth, but there were times when i was creating absurd hypotheticals as the other person or people spoke. some of the hypotheticals involved kidnapping and murdering children... solely for the purposes of video captured reactions. another favorite involved spearing the bride as she danced with her father. just being overcome by the love vibe... and getting really physical. something along the lines of... i need to have sex or get into a fight... or call an ex-girlfriend for sentimental posture purposes.
some people smile so much while they are chatting. it makes me think that they want me to think that they are permanently cheery. i really do not like that. all human beings of substantial intellect are subject to the paradoxical nature of our cognitive endeavors.
we try to live purposeful lives without purpose. there are going to be moments of confusion, sadness, joy, triumph, and so on. who are the plastic smiles aimed at? are there people out there that think better of the perpetually toothy. should i start looking into the practice of smile chatting. i have always been a bigger fan of reserved, yet genuine, interaction. maybe the "everything is great" facial expression is something i should adopt. i should be able to succeed like that.
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